Post by St. Louis Wrestling Rocks! on Apr 2, 2013 21:06:57 GMT -5
(Note: This story appeared on the main page as an April Fools spoof...though I wish it would happen for real to take out some undesirables...)
We had gotten a report via Twitter and Facebook comments that Team Richards in actions strongly resembling what went on in Iowa last year replayed themselves over Easter weekend. Davey Richards' crew, including Kyle O'Reilly, Tony Kozina, Darren Dean and Aaron Solo reportedly got into a major brawl in the locker room of an largely unadvertised event in central Illinois (we're still trying to ID where it happened) to leaving most everyone incapacitated. Right before intermission, Tony Kozina gave his opponent, said to be only 14 years old, multiple piledrivers, DDTs and powerbombs in a beating far worse than the one he gave 16 year old Ryan Kidd a year ago. The teenager, playing some sort of disco gimmick, cut a promo earlier in the night on Kozina he would put "the old geezer" into retirement and that the wrestling business isn't for anyone over 40. Several men charged out of the locker room in a rescue attempt only to be stopped by Team Richards in a pier-six brawl that went back to the locker room that continued for 15 minutes.
When intermission ended, Richards with his crew strolled back to the ring with a microphone. Tony Kozina opened by burying the promotion as another sorry example of yet another mark who bought a ring and taught themselves on how to wrestle. O'Reilly openly questioned why the state of Illinois got rid of the athletic commission to allow people who live on welfare to run a wrestling company. Darren Dean blasted the half-arsed "talent" who stole opportunities from him because they wrestle for free but don't know how to work. Aaron Solo backed up Dean in saying they spent way too many time and treasure to get to the level that their teacher is. Davey Richards closed it out by saying their warning that they would crush any fat, lazy bum who attempted to pass themselves off as a legitimate fighter that stepped in the ring with them wasn't heeded. He also told the stunned crowd to stop buying tickets to watch a bunch of backyarders attempt to wrestle before the group stormed out of the ring and drove off before police arrived.
The promoter, who was described as a true redneck hillbilly on welfare, was unable to comment as he was busy trying to fill out the new lengthy and complicated Obamacare claim forms using a pencil held by his teeth. It was said that he engaged Richards during that brawl and sustained numerous broken bones. Why this promoter booked Team Richards is a mystery, though a few unnamed sources stated his talent were trying to get booked with ROH. DFS is said to be investigating the incident and weighing whether to file criminal charges for child abuse and endangerment, and seek to put the injured teen into foster care.
We had gotten a report via Twitter and Facebook comments that Team Richards in actions strongly resembling what went on in Iowa last year replayed themselves over Easter weekend. Davey Richards' crew, including Kyle O'Reilly, Tony Kozina, Darren Dean and Aaron Solo reportedly got into a major brawl in the locker room of an largely unadvertised event in central Illinois (we're still trying to ID where it happened) to leaving most everyone incapacitated. Right before intermission, Tony Kozina gave his opponent, said to be only 14 years old, multiple piledrivers, DDTs and powerbombs in a beating far worse than the one he gave 16 year old Ryan Kidd a year ago. The teenager, playing some sort of disco gimmick, cut a promo earlier in the night on Kozina he would put "the old geezer" into retirement and that the wrestling business isn't for anyone over 40. Several men charged out of the locker room in a rescue attempt only to be stopped by Team Richards in a pier-six brawl that went back to the locker room that continued for 15 minutes.
When intermission ended, Richards with his crew strolled back to the ring with a microphone. Tony Kozina opened by burying the promotion as another sorry example of yet another mark who bought a ring and taught themselves on how to wrestle. O'Reilly openly questioned why the state of Illinois got rid of the athletic commission to allow people who live on welfare to run a wrestling company. Darren Dean blasted the half-arsed "talent" who stole opportunities from him because they wrestle for free but don't know how to work. Aaron Solo backed up Dean in saying they spent way too many time and treasure to get to the level that their teacher is. Davey Richards closed it out by saying their warning that they would crush any fat, lazy bum who attempted to pass themselves off as a legitimate fighter that stepped in the ring with them wasn't heeded. He also told the stunned crowd to stop buying tickets to watch a bunch of backyarders attempt to wrestle before the group stormed out of the ring and drove off before police arrived.
The promoter, who was described as a true redneck hillbilly on welfare, was unable to comment as he was busy trying to fill out the new lengthy and complicated Obamacare claim forms using a pencil held by his teeth. It was said that he engaged Richards during that brawl and sustained numerous broken bones. Why this promoter booked Team Richards is a mystery, though a few unnamed sources stated his talent were trying to get booked with ROH. DFS is said to be investigating the incident and weighing whether to file criminal charges for child abuse and endangerment, and seek to put the injured teen into foster care.